My son had his vaccinations yesterday. Okay, I know I’m entering into a major debate here but I need to unload. I have done as much research as I possibly could in terms of whether to vaccinate or not. I tried to create an alternative schedule with our doctor so that at least all shots are not given at the same time. I tried so hard not to fall into the pressure of one choice or the other. But I failed. Despite my gut and heart telling me that I was not completely comfortable with my son having his 6-month-old scheduled shots I went ahead with it.
So, as the nurse got ready I held my son’s manito while my husband and I sang his favorite song, “The Itsy Bitsy Spider”. And my son, like the little trooper he is, listened intently as we got to the “…down came the rain…” when the nurse stuck him with the needle. ¡Aye Dios Mio! He looked at me as if saying “Mami why?” and that was enough to make me question that same thing. Porque?
Well, maybe it’s not the fact that I worry about the repurcussions of the vaccinations or the possibility of a serious reaction – though a fever for the next few days, my son being loopy one minute and droopy the next is no better – what it probably comes down to is the fact that I don’t want to see him cry. Ever. And I don’t want to make a mistake as a mami. How do I know I’m making the right choice? What is this “mommy instinct” I hear so much about. When does that bell go off to warn me? “Ding, ding. Bad choice, bad choice!”
I am no expert. What I do know is this. My tummy is still turning from the choice I made. I feel like a bad mami no matter what I decide. But I still plan on reading more – like Dr. Sears’ The Vaccine Book – and checking out websites like www.cdc.gov/vaccines. There is a world of information out there and sometimes it can be overwhelming. But I’m going to use it to my advantage and try to make a decision that I feel more comfortable with before my son’s next appointment. Maybe I’ll check out MomTv.com tonight for Chic Mommy’s Show. Tonight she’s going to be talking about vaccinations. If I don’t see you there – they also replay the shows – tonight then I’ll fill you in later this week.
I’m looking forward to any suggestions or comments you may have on this topic. So, let me know what you think!
*My hubby would like you all to know that he is not a willing participant in my choice to NOT give my son flu shots. He just wanted you to know. Way to back me up, hon.*
With all my mamí love,